Hypocrisy

Last evening during my walking,I met an acquaintance.She had been abroad for the last two-three months.I began my conversation by asking about her trip abroad.She told me,"Well,my trip was just too good.In UK,it was summer time & the weather was just excellent.Moreover as there is no pollution there,I came back with my inhalers intact."She then stated that she was asthmatic.

Now,this lady is a medical professional.But she is the one who will buy & burn the maximum crackers this side of the town.Nobody needs to tell her what havoc the highly toxic smoke of the fire crackers play with anybody's breath-least of all,an asthmatic patient but to no avail.Really,what can you expect from a person who endangers her own health this way ?And that too who is in a profession which is to provide medical care to others ?

This is the same person who is talking about non-pollution in another nation.Really,how can people have such double standards-one for themselves & another completely opposite for others? How can a person expect that others should care about your health when you are yourself exposing your body to dangers ?

For each & every thing, the rule of law does not work.For some things,people have to come forward & do policing themselves.If we omit to do the least minimum tasks voluntarily,then we all are only fit to be ruled by a military junta.

Hopefully, many people are unlike the lady here.That is why,the Indians rejected the emergency.So,let us all come together & do our bit for the society-pool the cars,use public transport ,protect public property, reduce & ultimately eliminate lighting up fire crackers( anyway it is only money going up in smoke literally)et al.This will also stabilize our tax burden if not reduce it.But maybe I am barking up the wrong tree.

All this needs to be done by the upper echelons of our society as the middle class is already doing it anyway.But let us all middle class members remember to continue with all this even as we move up the economic ladder.

Guru

Today is teacher's day,the birthday of our ex-President Dr. Sarvapalli Radhakrishnan.

I think anybody can be our Guru,anybody who teaches us some lesson -even our own life by circumstances it gives rise to as also by showing us examples as we traverse this journey.

While in school,I was influenced by my teachers- namely the English teacher.She was just perfect to sum up all.She taught us with a passion & today whatever I am able to write is all due to her efforts as a teacher.I met her later, when she was the Principal of the school where my kid studied but that was too brief.She had the same enthusiasm for her job even on the verge of retirement.I was quite embarrassed by my kids antics in front of her but she was delighted to meet me & my kid after a long hiatus.I hope to visit her sometimes later when I travel to the metro wherein she resides now.

In college, for my graduation ,I had another teacher who would be amused at my clumsiness in practicals of chemistry but she was rather fond of me.But I disappointed her by just managing a first class. She had thought that I was slated for a higher score.I met her years later at the beach & she was happy to see me with my family. I even met her kids & she looked the same - full of affection.

At the law college,most of the lecturers were only teachers for part of the time.The rest of the time ,they were busy in the courts.But they still managed to inspire us.I had joined coaching for public services exams with one lecturer who was a solicitor also.He was an institution in himself.He taught us taxation & was superb in his subject.Also,he was up to something new & interesting in his classes.I never cleared the public services exams but managed to complete my law.I met him recently & he made tea for me ! Really,that moment -I will cherish for ever.He was kind enough to advice me,"Please never go in for a job just because they are paying well.Think of the people you will be working with."As,I asked for his mobile number,he said,"I never keep a mobile.People call you on the mobile at their convenience which may be inconvenient for us."
I do intend keeping in touch with my gurus till I can.This is so as I think,we all need Gurus to lead us in life.

I am certain,I will meet more people who will be teachers in my life hereafter even though it was never meant to be in that typical guru-shishya parampara.I would like to add a couplet of Kabir on the need for Gurus,"Guru gobind dou khade,kake laagun paay,balihari guru aapne jo Gobind diyo bataye" -Kabir sings"When Guru & God are both there,whose feet should I touch ( first)-the feet of the  Guru, as he ( she ) only made me aware of God."This paean is the ultimate on the prime position of Guru in our lives.

Rasoi.

Being a homemaker, does have its own pros-well if you look at them that way.I have started taking more interest in cooking-maybe, because I have nothing else to do.No,but still,I am partial to eating tasty food & since I am old enough to do it myself,I make a go for it.Obviously, I can't ask my mom or worse still, my mom-in law to try their hands at fusion cooking or better still hybrid rasoi.

I am petrified of making chapatis- phulkas are fine, but, the chapatis, wherein, you fold them,apply grease ,sorry oil & then again roll them out is something,I, have not been able to perfect so far.Hence,the dependence on the maid for the same as my kid is only fond of rotis for her dabba.She has refused to switch over to any nashta items like poha,upma,seviayan upma et al.

I am also coerced by my hubby to refrain from using onions,drumsticks,cauliflower,etc in my cooking as he feels these are tamsik foods.Not that I am a very obedient wife, but then, when I have to cook only for two to three persons,I find it illogical, to prepare separate dishes for each family member.Garlic,I have never used so far.

Moreover,my dad suffers from bleeeding piles & so I use masalas in the most minimalistic way.In addition,I have to use oil as if I am doing oil free cooking as my dad is a heart patient as well.Recently,my mom has been diagonised with diabetes & hence sweetness also has disappeared from my dishes.

Now, you may be tempted to ask if my rasoi has any swad ? Well,for that you will have to volunteer & test the food by tasting it.

I have found that dahi & malai can be used with wonderful results.I use malai in pulavs as also while kneading stuffed parathas.Mind you,the malai, I get in my home is the one which is of cow's milk.So, that is almost fat free.I loathe malai & hence, try to use it in dishes where it will not add to the taste except add some creamy texture to the dish.

In upmas,instead of water ,a diluted version of chaas can be used which will make the upmas tastier & tangier.I make upma by using lapsi rava -I prefer the finer variety of lapsi but even the coarse lapsi rava can give good results but, it would cook better in a pressure cooker.I have been told by my north Indian friends that they cook dalia in cookers.

One of my neighbours has revealed a secret-she puts kadipattas in the dal before pressure cooking the dal.This saves vagar oil-you need less oil for mustard & jeera seeds.My Maharashtrian friends have told me that adding haldi & hing to the dal in the pressure cooker gives an excellent aroma to the dal & I have followed their advice ever since.

While preparing sabzis,prepare vagar only with mustard,jeera, urad dal, & dried red chillies .The other ingredients like kadiaptta,green chillies,can be added along with the veggies.Even haldi & hing can be added after the veggies have been put into the kadhai.This way, you use less oil as also the haldi does not get burnt.

I use very little amount of masalas as well.Salt,I try to add at the last just before I have to put off the gas.This is so because,I had read that as the dish nears completion,it needs less salt.Moreover,namak kam is the mantra in this age of high blood pressure.

I feel my rasoi though sounding taste less will get to be the norm -well, for reasons more economic than for health.With the cost of food items aiming for the sky,it makes sound economic sense to use less & less of more & more ingredients,isn't it ?

Exploitation.

Years ago ,I had read an article by Bunker Roy, that the more educated we are,the more, we tend to exploit the other lesser mortals.

I am narrating a story now-a present day tale which will raise doubts as to who is exploiting whom ?There is a man who is physically challenged. He is married to a village girl for obvious reasons.His elder brothers-two of them are married to two sisters who are from town & from families who are better off as against the family of the village girl.The in-laws stay with the physically challenged man & wife.The family is fine as time passes & he fathers two sons.But the wife feels inferior or maybe thinks that she has been cheated & starts raising her voice.This leads to frequent arguments in the house & later to physical violence.Finally,the two separate & an alimony of a pittance of five lakhs is paid & the wife goes back home to her village.A part of the deal, is that, the sons will stay with the father & grandparents.So now,in this case who is exploited ? The man or the wife ? What about the kids ? Also,the grandmother is now constantly on her toes taking care of the kids-they have just started going to school.One solution suggested, would be, to send the boys to a hostel from where they complete their education.But the father though working in a bank is not earning so well that he can support an expensive education for them.

In all this,who is to be blamed-the inlaws,the parents of the village woman as they thought an alimony in lakhs would somehow alleviate their poverty? But where does all this leave the kids ? They have to spend their entire life without their mother for no fault of theirs.Did the brothers who got married to the two sisters do nothing to save their brother's marriage ? Moreover,why was a simple village girl chosen for him -so that she would accept everything & not protest ? In such situations,it is indeed difficult, to point fingers & say that one person is at fault.
But such situations,make us understand that we all are perpetually exploiting one another -consciously as also unconsciously.An office acquaintance -between a woman & a man though starts off as a friendship goes on to become a torrid affair.Many times,the man may be blamed for exploiting the woman for seeking sexual favours but sometimes the woman is also game to it whereby, she also is seeking a promotion or maybe she just wants to have fun.But in today's age,the morals of yesterday no longer hold good.But still,the bottom line, must be, not to seek pleasure at the cost of causing pain to others.This is because, if we are cruel to others because they behaved that way ,then there is no difference between them & us.

Sometimes,it is, for our own selfish needs & at other times, for satisfying our egos.We have all behaved as sadists in many situations in our life-causing untold pain,grief & misery to others which in turn comes back to haunt us.

Perhaps,this will end, only, if, we try to be less & less egoistic & think about the pain we will inflict on others as also the consequences of our actions.