A home for Tink !

Green house that is home to Tink.

Harini,my daughter has gone crazy.She has taken to Tinker bell,the fairy in such a big way that she sleeps,eats,drinks & breathes Tink .Really this is quite exhausting.Her exams are on & the only thing she can concentrate on is the fairy.

She coerced her dad to get her a VCD on the latest film on that two winged tiny creature & has watched it  umpteen times.She also brought in her chums to watch it -obviously to get them converted like her.I dunno if she succeeded.But all this is going on in the thick of her exams ! How I wish she could concentrate atleast one tenth of what she does so passionately for Tink on her studies but then ,such is not my luck nor the teachers as they will discover from her answers.

In all this frenzy for Tink,Harini was inspired by the movie to build a house for her newfound love.She scrouged our  house & got a cardboard box.From this, she cut out squares & rectangles to make windows & a door.She camr across squarish pieces of glass which she painstakingly added as windows.One of the galss piece is a sealed window & two other pieces are open windows.The door is of  cardboard & is rectangular.

She took some cotton & made it into a bedding & a pillow for Tink. This is laid on a cardboard bed .The cardboard bed is a rectangle resting on four cardboard legs.On the cotton bedding she put a piece of velvet cloth-cut from her discarded dress sleeve.The velvet is  violet in color.From the same sleeve,she cut out two more pieces.She punched it at one end with a paper punch to make holes.These pieces were to be the curtains for the open windows .She took a straw & hung the curtains after passing the straw through the holes punched into them.

Then she took a polythene  glass  & covered it with a  circular cardboard lid .This was taped to the side of the house.This is the mail -box for Tink.Harini also built a table & chair -both from cardboard for Tink.On the table is placed a ceramic kettle & a tea cup & saucer.This tea set is a present from  her cousin .The roof of the house has an opening covered with a polythene sheet so that one can view it from the top.


The door of the house has a grand stand resting on two cardboard props with a roof attached to the house.There is a bell hanging from this roof to ring.This bell idea is copied from the movie.

Then Harini covered the roof with newspaper & painted it blue.She also painted the house  with green & yellow colour on the outside.I helped with painting.This was more out of compulsion rather than choice as Harini had taken out so much of paint from the tube that I felt compelled to use it.I also used brown colour to cover up things on the cardboard box.

She also put stars & other shiny embellishments on the walls of the house -on both sides of the door.On the side ,one can notice that it belongs to Tinker Bell as the name Tinker Bell is glued on the left side of the house in the snap.

On the door there are some flowers struck to make it look inviting.


The house does not have a floor -it is open from below.Harini uses the emergency lamp to light up the interiors of the home .Actually,she wastes a lot of energy on lighting up.A lot of other things were wasted in this venture-cello tapes.I am thinking of investing in shares & stocks of a cello tape manufacturer now.

But apart from that,all other material used is waste material .So this is a Green house -as it has made use of recycling waste materials.She did it fast in three to four days -a record time ,wouldn't you all agree ?

Moreover, she has painstakingly built it with lots of  love for Tink .The result is, that the house that she built for Tink has become a home now !

On second thoughts,  if only , our builders could take a lesson from all this ? !

Atonement

The one question which has perplexed me for quite some time is "Why ME  ?"The result is that ,I constantly harbour negative thoughts about myself & my life.

My father says that this is all a result of past karma.But then, how does one reconcile this with another thought which states that both hell & heaven are on this earth only -meaning that there will be extreme misery & everlasting  joy  depending on our behavior being bad & good. My mother opines, that, I am very fortunate as others have seen & undergone worse. She is right, but, I fail to appreciate my bundle of sorrows  which is light as a feather compared to others who are cursed to a life of abject poverty,absolute loneliness,etc.Some are so sick that they remain bedridden for life .I am lucky, as I have, never suffered any of these & still, keep harping on my supposed miseries.

But, I persist in my view, that, fate has been unkind to me.I had to give up a job which was very comfy -being in Public Sector .Moreover,I was an officer, not a clerk.I had acquired technical qualifications so that, I get the required promotions.I was an okay officer-obedient & sincere but I had to quit .I have tried to come to terms with this, but, to no avail.

I have taken up writing but met with hardly any success.I also cook with a passion but the problem is that there is hardly anyone to appreciate the dishes.My kid is too young & fussy to eat the dishes .My hubby is travelling 24x7 & so is unable to relish any of my culinary forays.The outcome is, that, I have to taste my food & though ,they turn out to be edible ,I end up eating them for days.Moreover,I believe in zero wastage.I feel guilty of being a non -  earning spouse & do my bit for saving.



I draw rangolis for my bi-weekly pujas of Ganpati & Lakshmi .I also have taken up chanting of slokas in Sanskrit,as also verses in Marathi & Hindi.This ,I feel may please the Almighty to at least  turn in my direction if not bless me.But looks like my rangolis are only being tolerated by the Gods because if they expressly told me so,that would mean that I am a true devotee.I am just doing all this to fight my acute loneliness.If my act of praying , drawing rangolis conveys any form of  prayaschit ,then all the more better. So far,I have drawn a blank.

I have talked to my hubby umpteen times to opt for a job wherein his touring will be minimised but he is in love with his job & won't budge.I have tried to drown myself in other housework like dusting,cleaning,sewing buttons,etc but still, I feel, the days are pretty long not only in summer but throughout the year.

My hubby suggested, that I take up some course but again my sense of economics  forbids me from taking up such options.Moreover,I feel that ,once I join a course,my expectations will rise further & just end in frustration leading to depression.I already think, I am more qualified than my ex-colleagues, who are still on their jobs . I am only a home maker now.I really fail to understand any justice in this .This has made God a bitter idol for me in many instances.But then,I feel afraid, that my attitude  may distance me from him all the more than ever before & I start praying once again.

I wish, that, I could feel positive about the things I  have got instead of lamenting.I am in good health in my forties which is a gift bequeathed by the Almighty  .Moreover,I am on attendance for my kid throughout & am delighted to see her growing up.Also,I am able to read,write,pray ,cook et al which many may not be able to do because of paucity of time  & or for other reasons.

I also have developed better observational skills now, that, I am at home .I have also steadily improved my sense of appreciation of all things, however, small they are.On second thoughts,I have a feeling , that God wants me to realise all this as my prayashchit is underway.I am glad, that, I have been given a chance for atonement of my sins-past & present.This just symbolizes that all is not lost , not yet !

I have also started praying afresh as now,I pray to God to just let me undergo whatever life has in store for me .whatever be the consequences.

Men & Women.

This is a topic on which all of us can go on & on...We all agree that men are different from women in many respects -physically as also mentally.

Women will always think about the family first unlike, men, who will think about all, except family.They feel it is the woman's job to even think about the family !It is not that men are terribly busy at work in office .It is just the way they think -an innate ,inborn, inherent  tendency to think only about themselves.Men gossip at work & outside & I feel they are more at it than the women, but women are always blamed for being rumor mongers.How unfair !

I have a brother who is so much in love with the computers that if my computer breaks down ,he will come rushing in to have a look at it.But if anything were to happen to me,he is least bothered.My hubby is a step ahead.He is in love with nobody.He will always excuse himself in any emergency as he cannot get leave or that leave won't be sanctioned.

My friend 's  hubby  opines  that hard work never killed anyone ( he actually means women-his wife) but then he does not want to try it himself !I have a cousin brother who will always side with the maids whenever his wife complains about them.He believes this is his way of being pro-labour.But he has no sympathy for the hard labour his wife puts in to keep the house spic & span.My brother in law works for a finance company & he is forever working there on festivals,holidays et al.His wife says that he is wedded to the company & not to her.Obviously all at the home front is her botheration.

Recently,I accompanied my kid  as she had to be dropped at a school for a mathematics competitive examination.It was a Sunday & the test was scheduled to start at 12 in the noon.Many moms had come to leave the wards but fathers were few & far between.So,on Sundays also, dads are busy - in fact, they are more busy on holidays -reading newspapers ,drinking endless cups of tea,coffee,relaxing amongst other things ! Mothers are always relaxed -so they never need a break !

Many men will not do any household chores as they feel it is not their job but slowly attitudes are changing.As women go on jobs out of their homes,men have to share housework.But still,in India,men are not brought up that way .As Gloria Steinem opines,"We've begun to raise daughters more like sons... but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters. "


Women are the care takers in the family -men aren't bothered -they state that women are the best nurses.This is very convenient thinking so that men don't get involved in the caring .They all are cared by the woman only- no matter, how busy she is .Caring is her duty.In our nation,men decide about when he can have sex with his wife,which college the kids will go,when will the children be married ,etc.But the woman has to nurture the kids ,do seva of the senior citizens at home & so on & so forth.Her opinion is never sought about higher education for her children nor about the marriage.She is like an unpaid servant whose presence is acknowledged only when things go wrong .Gloria Steinem said ,"Most American children suffer too much mother and too little father. "This is true for all nations & across all communities -the world over.



Though,we all are slowly & steadily changing -men coming to terms that a woman can also get tired even if she is only a home maker ( a homemaker works as hard as women on jobs- maybe, harder).Women are also scaling new heights & leaving sacrificing themselves at the altar for family,etal -they know being a devi is not worth the effort.It does not promise divinity.


All said & done,females still think about others before themselves. To quote Gloria Steinem again,"I've yet to be on a campus where most women weren't worrying about some aspect of combining marriage, children, and a career. I've yet to find one where many men were worrying about the same thing."Such a long journey has been traversed but ,still,we have along way to go...