Monday, March 22, 2010
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Bosses & Colleagues.
Bosses are intimidating & colleagues are co workers.But not necessarily so .Sometimes,bosses are better than friends & co-workers worse than enemies.
I had a colleague who was very IT savvy .I was a novice in the suburban office.It was this guy, who taught me all that was to learn about IT .This led to a lot of heated exchanges with others in the office who opined that he was favoring me over them for no reason.My parents went abroad & my daughter was kept in creche .I was thinking aloud about taking a long leave from office.My colleague stated that he will create conditions so that I could leave office at the dot to be with my daughter.He also told me that he will arrange for medical certificates in case,no one was ready to oblige me in emergencies.It was only due to his assurance that I attended office regularly till my parents returned as my colleague fully supported me as promised.
As against this,my boss then, in that office was a short tempered person who wanted all his staff to be workaholics. .He used to have a set of keys of the safe box wherein all the daily cash collected by the office as insurance premium was kept .I used to have another set of the same keys in my capacity as the in charge of the safe.Once,my daughter fell ill.I rang up my boss to inform that I will be taking off as my kid was unwell.I requested him to bring his set of cash keys to office.He started screaming on the phone itself & told me that he will not look for his set of keys & that it was my duty to get the safe keys to office.I somehow managed to get the set of keys delivered to office through my hubby but this episode left a very bitter taste.
In the same office,some of my lady co workers would work overtime & expect my department to close down the office including taking backup of the IT work.We tried to tell them that they either wind up early or learn to do back up operations but they always feigned that they were too overloaded to look into all these trivial issues .Moreover,our boss always supported them, as they, worked in departments where palms were always greased to allow lubrication.This always led to situations wherein I was in office as late as dinner time along with a peon for company who always bored me with stories of ghosts of ex-staff members stalking the office !
In the city office,I had another boss who was very empathetic.As I was transferred to another city,he was sympathetic & goaded me to continue in service.He also came to my residence to deliver a certificate to facilitate my absence from work.He was terribly upset when I tendered in my resignation.I had hardly any options left as my paid leave was being denied & sick leave needed to be certified.I felt, that I was misusing the goodwill of my ex-boss for my selfish need of medical leave .Moreover,my new boss was leaving no stone unturned to insult me day in & day out.This I was unable to handle & hence,I gave up the job.My new colleagues had just begun knowing me & fully supported me but fate had other plans.
I have fond memories of peons who would take up cudgels on my behalf in front of superiors.I can also recall that some bosses tried to shift me because they wanted to settle some scores among themselves.In short,some bosses & colleagues are occupational hazards while other bosses & co workers are like the icing on the cake !
I had a colleague who was very IT savvy .I was a novice in the suburban office.It was this guy, who taught me all that was to learn about IT .This led to a lot of heated exchanges with others in the office who opined that he was favoring me over them for no reason.My parents went abroad & my daughter was kept in creche .I was thinking aloud about taking a long leave from office.My colleague stated that he will create conditions so that I could leave office at the dot to be with my daughter.He also told me that he will arrange for medical certificates in case,no one was ready to oblige me in emergencies.It was only due to his assurance that I attended office regularly till my parents returned as my colleague fully supported me as promised.
As against this,my boss then, in that office was a short tempered person who wanted all his staff to be workaholics. .He used to have a set of keys of the safe box wherein all the daily cash collected by the office as insurance premium was kept .I used to have another set of the same keys in my capacity as the in charge of the safe.Once,my daughter fell ill.I rang up my boss to inform that I will be taking off as my kid was unwell.I requested him to bring his set of cash keys to office.He started screaming on the phone itself & told me that he will not look for his set of keys & that it was my duty to get the safe keys to office.I somehow managed to get the set of keys delivered to office through my hubby but this episode left a very bitter taste.
In the same office,some of my lady co workers would work overtime & expect my department to close down the office including taking backup of the IT work.We tried to tell them that they either wind up early or learn to do back up operations but they always feigned that they were too overloaded to look into all these trivial issues .Moreover,our boss always supported them, as they, worked in departments where palms were always greased to allow lubrication.This always led to situations wherein I was in office as late as dinner time along with a peon for company who always bored me with stories of ghosts of ex-staff members stalking the office !
In the city office,I had another boss who was very empathetic.As I was transferred to another city,he was sympathetic & goaded me to continue in service.He also came to my residence to deliver a certificate to facilitate my absence from work.He was terribly upset when I tendered in my resignation.I had hardly any options left as my paid leave was being denied & sick leave needed to be certified.I felt, that I was misusing the goodwill of my ex-boss for my selfish need of medical leave .Moreover,my new boss was leaving no stone unturned to insult me day in & day out.This I was unable to handle & hence,I gave up the job.My new colleagues had just begun knowing me & fully supported me but fate had other plans.
I have fond memories of peons who would take up cudgels on my behalf in front of superiors.I can also recall that some bosses tried to shift me because they wanted to settle some scores among themselves.In short,some bosses & colleagues are occupational hazards while other bosses & co workers are like the icing on the cake !
Monday, March 15, 2010
Rangoliyan
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
The burden of obligations.
I am residing at my brother's house since the last five to six years .Though I pay rent I feel obliged & burdened by that .One reason is that the rent is not based on market rate.Another is that if this house was rented out to someone else,it would have fetched my brother a handsome market rent.Moreover,my sibling may have decided to stay put in another town as he did not want to disturb my place of dwelling .I am not willing to shift as my daughter's school is conveniently located to this flat.Another reason is my deep sense of insecurity of losing friends & neighbours with whom I have got accustomed.I think at this stage in my life ( I am in my mid forties ) ,I won;t be able to start from the beginning of acquainting strangers, befriending them & them maintaining relations with them thereafter.Actually,I want to stay here & still want that I should be free from any feelings of guilt as well.I want to have the best of everything at others cost !
Any activity -physical & mental strains & stresses me no end so much so, that, I am trying to lessen my phone conversations & personal contacts.I rarely ring up my ex-colleagues,friends,relatives unless it becomes imperative.This is economical in these days of high inflation.Moreover,I am also doing my bit to save this way.This frees me somewhat from this sense of duty to my hubby since I am no longer earning now.My debt has weighed me down very much & continues to grow on a daily basis .The result is that I try to save wherever & whenever I can.I try to walk short distances & would have walked even longer ones but for the fact that my daughter would disagree to walk besides me.Moreover,I try to minimise use of power,water,food etc. But the feeling of guilt that I am only spending whatever my husband is working hard never leaves me.His assurances to lessen my thrift to live in comfort have had no effect on me.
My parents have helped me in many innumerable ways & now also when they offer to assist me,I get petrified.I feel that my acceptance of their generous offers will burden me all the more & then I have to behave in a certain way.I am not at all conscious of what I have accepted with the result that my attitude may lead to pain .They may be left wondering as to what they have done to deserve all this.
This is a feeling I get every now & then whenever anyone even offers to support me.They may be relatives,friends,acquaintances etal but I feel uncomfortable.One reason being that I may never bee able to return the favour leading to heartburn.Another, is I feel, highly indebted to such persons .Then I have to always keep that in mind that they had stood by me in my hours or days or maybe months or even years of need.This baggage is very cumbersome to carry as I age.
Moreover some will try to remind us all too often that they have helped us & how, with the minutest details.This is because, they believe, that, all whom they magnanimously aided forget easily ( if not done so already).These reminders just add to the enormity of the burden of duty towards these people.It is true, that very often, after we have fought with the people who helped us before or have some differences with such people,we very easily forget their good deeds done for us.But still,I feel ,they should refrain from reminding us -however subtle.At least,we can rest with lesser weight of obligation on our heads.
It is said, that, even strangers help us in times of need & similarly God will give us a chance to assist others.The people who helped us may not be the same to whom we may offer assistance is also said to be a fact. Maybe, that's why I have rarely favoured anyone.No,don't get me wrong-I am trying to be fair & just.I don't want anybody obliged to me for a lifetime ( their's or mine ? ) for having supported them or even offered to do so .
But for all I know,people may still feel gratuitous- for, I am doing my best, not to burden them.But God seems to have understood my predicament as I have not felt any such feelings for the Almighty .On second thoughts,maybe it was God only, in these instances ( whenever anyone supported me ) who got me to overcome so many hurdles ! Nah,not that again-please spare me your debt , my Lord !
Any activity -physical & mental strains & stresses me no end so much so, that, I am trying to lessen my phone conversations & personal contacts.I rarely ring up my ex-colleagues,friends,relatives unless it becomes imperative.This is economical in these days of high inflation.Moreover,I am also doing my bit to save this way.This frees me somewhat from this sense of duty to my hubby since I am no longer earning now.My debt has weighed me down very much & continues to grow on a daily basis .The result is that I try to save wherever & whenever I can.I try to walk short distances & would have walked even longer ones but for the fact that my daughter would disagree to walk besides me.Moreover,I try to minimise use of power,water,food etc. But the feeling of guilt that I am only spending whatever my husband is working hard never leaves me.His assurances to lessen my thrift to live in comfort have had no effect on me.
My parents have helped me in many innumerable ways & now also when they offer to assist me,I get petrified.I feel that my acceptance of their generous offers will burden me all the more & then I have to behave in a certain way.I am not at all conscious of what I have accepted with the result that my attitude may lead to pain .They may be left wondering as to what they have done to deserve all this.
This is a feeling I get every now & then whenever anyone even offers to support me.They may be relatives,friends,acquaintances etal but I feel uncomfortable.One reason being that I may never bee able to return the favour leading to heartburn.Another, is I feel, highly indebted to such persons .Then I have to always keep that in mind that they had stood by me in my hours or days or maybe months or even years of need.This baggage is very cumbersome to carry as I age.
Moreover some will try to remind us all too often that they have helped us & how, with the minutest details.This is because, they believe, that, all whom they magnanimously aided forget easily ( if not done so already).These reminders just add to the enormity of the burden of duty towards these people.It is true, that very often, after we have fought with the people who helped us before or have some differences with such people,we very easily forget their good deeds done for us.But still,I feel ,they should refrain from reminding us -however subtle.At least,we can rest with lesser weight of obligation on our heads.
It is said, that, even strangers help us in times of need & similarly God will give us a chance to assist others.The people who helped us may not be the same to whom we may offer assistance is also said to be a fact. Maybe, that's why I have rarely favoured anyone.No,don't get me wrong-I am trying to be fair & just.I don't want anybody obliged to me for a lifetime ( their's or mine ? ) for having supported them or even offered to do so .
But for all I know,people may still feel gratuitous- for, I am doing my best, not to burden them.But God seems to have understood my predicament as I have not felt any such feelings for the Almighty .On second thoughts,maybe it was God only, in these instances ( whenever anyone supported me ) who got me to overcome so many hurdles ! Nah,not that again-please spare me your debt , my Lord !
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